Don’t Give Up On Me

To my friends: don’t give up on me for having to cancel or reschedule plans.

To my husband: don’t give up on me if the house isn’t clean all the time or I have days where I’m not at my best.

To my parents: don’t give up on me — I’ll still make you proud despite illness.

To my colleagues and clients: don’t give up on me, I’m working as hard as I can.

Most importantly …

To myself:

Ashley, do not give up on yourself. Yes, you may feel like your illnesses are taking some things away from you. You may think that your life hasn’t turned out how you pictured. Things may be harder for you than your peers. Your body, your hobbies, your career — all of these things may suffer or change because of pain or illness.

But don’t give up.

Forget the doctor who basically told you to give up and get a wheelchair and a cane.

Forget the doctors who tell you you’re running out of options.

Life is full of options and opportunities.

Here’s what you and everyone living with illness should remember:

You can be both realistic and optimistic. Facts are facts. Science is science. But that doesn’t mean that faith can’t also get us far. That doesn’t mean that miracles don’t happen. They do. And that doesn’t mean that medical research/medical treatments won’t progress — I mean, look at how far we have come already!

There’s never a reason to lose hope or give up faith.

But it is also good to always be realistic, too — and to remember that we are all bio-individually unique and that no one’s medical journey is the same as someone else’s.

I see no problem in being aware of the worst case scenarios while also praying for the best … and living your best life all the while! And in my mind faith and science can coexist. Even in the midst of statistics, science, medicine, and facts, (none of which can be realistically or rationally denied) … in my mind, God and faith can be bigger than any problem that we are dealt — and I cannot deny that, either.Positivity is not about faking that everything is perfect.It is about your attitude and how you cope with the problems at hand!

I’ve tried to make this point before and fear that it has offended some people… but hopefully this clarifies what I’m trying to say.

My approach to my medical issues has always been to stay abreast of new research, to not put my head in the sand, and be aware of the worst case scenarios and of what realistically my future could be like… but at the same time always staying positive, never losing hope or faith, and never, ever giving up or believing that my future or my limitations are set in stone.There is strength and grace in awareness, faith, and empowerment. All of these things are essential to be a steward of your own health. And when all else fails: “Let Go, Let God!” 💕

I applaud and respect everyone on this journey, no matter how you handle it. Remember, however you cope is okay. We are all human and we are put here to love and help each other, not to judge where someone else is in their healing process or how they are coping with their disease. There is no one “right” way. We are allowed to feel whatever we are feeling.That space to grow and to flourish is a blessing to our life and THAT is where positivity lives, even on the dark and difficult days that, let’s face it, we ALL have!
Love & Light,- A

2 thoughts on “Don’t Give Up On Me

  1. I appreciate your sentiments, Ashley! It is comforting and validating to read how others living with a chronic disease deal with all the “stuff”. Relationships have been my biggest loss. Some of them do not survive a rheumatoid arthritis diagnosis, which is my situation. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

  2. Pingback: To Friends I’ve Lost Because of Illness |

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